WTF? Where do these people come from?

This actually just happened to me a few hours ago and it’s too good to pass up.

Walking into my apartment tonight. My neighbor, a mom of two (kids are probably 2 and 4 months). Here’s the conversation as I can remember it:

Her: Do you know what you’re having?
Me: (Looks at lunch bag. Is quite confused as dinner was eaten hours ago.)
Her: The baby. Do you know what you’re having yet? You’re pregnant, aren’t you?
Me: No. Not yet. Hopefully soon. (using far more grace than I have ever had in total in my life up until this point — I have now used all allotted grace until year 2016) We’re being treated for infertility.
Her: Oh. Cause I heard someone in the building was pregnant and I thought it had to be you.

Editor’s note: Okay, thanks. I just friggin told you that we’re a) not pregnant, and b) infertile. And you basically just called me fat. Thanks for that. I hope we have more chats like this.

Me: Yeah, it’s not us. But thanks. I’ll let you know if it becomes us (with a smile).
Her: Cause if you get pregnant, I have a lot of nearly new stuff that you can have.
Me: Thanks. I’ll, uh, let you know.

Which makes me feel bad, cause that’s actually a nice gesture. But I still hate you a little and I hope your new baby poops in your bed tonight.

And then my muskrat pelt fell off. Into a puddle of melty snow. And I went inside and cried.

The following remarks would make the FCC shit a brick. Consider yourself warned.

What I wanted to say:

Me: Listen, you cruel fat bitch. Mind your own fucking business. My father is on his death bed and is in the midst of having an epiphany that I am actually his daughter and that maybe treating me like absolute shit for the first 21 years of my life might have been a misstep. So now he gives a shit. And frankly, I am having a tough time caring. And I already feel really bad about it and I don’t know what to do. And my brother is putting me through the wringer about it. And work has been really hard lately.

And I don’t have any kids. But you’re pretty much a crackwhore, and you have two. And I’m trying to move overseas — and, here’s the kicker — having no family there might get me stuck here, but, wait for it, I don’t have any family here either. And I could leave this country tomorrow and very few people would notice. And I will make friends there because I make friends everywhere. And I found out tonight during my 4 p.m. to midnight shift that I now work 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. on Tuesdays, effective Feb. 27. And I am. Not. Real. Amused.

So leave me the fuck alone. And take your grimey poop-stained kids’ crap and shove it.

Stomps on muskrat pelt and exits stage left.

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7 responses to “WTF? Where do these people come from?

  1. Oh, Kirby, it never rains but it pours, eh? Big hugs to you.

  2. Well, the Israeli chutzpah you’ve already got 😉

  3. Whoa…..you go girl. Lots on your plate and guess what this is the place to talk about it. VENT!!!! Hope you have a better tomorrow.

  4. To just breeze on by your comment about inferitilty and continue with her pointless babbling…..that kind of crap makes me soooooo angry. When I get that reaction from people, I get this itchy justified-violence urge…..Sorry you had to deal with that…..

    ….and also very sorry about the situation with father. I can relate, and hope you are able to find some peace in your relationship.

  5. I was recently in a meeting at work, and one of my coworkers asked me if I was pregnant (based on some sort of miscommunication). I said no, and felt my cheeks turn bright red. “Don’t worry, I’m not pregnant either!” said another coworker, a 60 year old grandmother. “And neither is S”- a 22 year old single girl.

    Thanks, guys. Way to make an already awkward situation even more awkward!

  6. HUMUNGOUS HUGS!

    You have my empathy and lots and lots of massive hugs.

    I loved your internal monologue of what you wanted to say. Good luck with the IVF and the move.

    So sorry about your Dad.

    Hugs

  7. David Gollinger

    Kirby,
    you are a talented and incredible writer. Is that your calling???
    I have just about read all your blogs this evening for the first time. Everything since August ’06. IF blows trust me. My wife and I have been trying for the past year. I am 42…. she is 44. So the % -ages are not the best. It is funny the situations life throws at one. Let me expand….. Last fall Sept 29th / 5 months to the day we had our first transfer. 3 Embryos were tranferred results were not favorable. Big – time letdown….. letdown….. letdown… So, We took some time in October.. to reflect upon the sitch. reeling from the letdown we mutually decided we would re-visit it in December. Why not,,, the busiest time of the year for family to be around. When a IF couple does a procedure they really do not want alot of family around to give their 2cents. So we decided not to tranfer in December. We contacted the institute to schedule cycle and transfer for the first part of ’07. That is when we learned that our Dr. was killed in a car accident in Bakersfield on his way to one of their satellite clinics. Now here is a man that is traveling all over CA. to help couples make their lives complete with children. We were devastated.This was “our” DR. he was the man that we have built our trust and faith and hope in. Gone just like that. We also learned that his wife was pregnant with their 3rd child and went into labor less than 24 hours after he was killed and delivered a baby girl. Now my view all the sudden is that our IF situation is nothing in comparison to our “Dr.’s” family and his colleagues loss and all of the other IF patient that he has. We soon thereafter contacted his associate in the same office and now began the cycling again last month. Building a new relationship with our new Dr. “great man” as well. Today 01MAR07 was our transfer date. So, we arrive at the office reception today and we were immediately greeted by his assistant in the waiting area. She immediately drops the bomb on my wife and I informing us that our “doc” is not in today he got called out on an emergency and would not be there to perform the transfer. We now are to be introduced to a new doc that we have never met before. Less than 5 minutes after we were informed. I was frikken furious. We talked it out. and moved on from the dissapointment. The transfer was done flawlessy he “got in” with little effort. Hurrah! Now the waiting. My beautiful wife is now resting at the moment and I will be caring for her all weekend so this will take. I know this will take. Moral….. of the story is We Must accept what life deal and deal with it. There are alot of people in the word that are much worse off that al of us IF folks. Stay Positive / Peace Out!!!!!!!!

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