Dumb things I’ve done lately, abridged

1. Discussed my IUI in front of a hummus display at the local market.

“I’ve heard the Sabra Luscious Lemon is especially good with sperm. Think of it like blinis.” *

2. Discussed my potential aliyah in my work cafeteria — in the event it is not immediately apparent why this lacks intelligence, suffice it to say my employer is not “in the know” about our potential move.

3. And my favorite which I’ve hitherto not admitted: When asked/forced to have a photo taken of me for my RE’s office, I returned the favor and insisted on being allowed to take photos of everyone who is treating me.

After the initial awkward silence, I was assured it would actually be okay for me to take said photos. I don’t think they knew I actually had my digital camera with me.

And so I did. I have pics of both docs, most of the nurses, the receptionists, the financial consultants and a nice group shot of the lab techs. I did not suggest I be allowed to photograph their cervixes. Especially not the men.

Moral of the story: never trust a woman that carries a large purse. You never know what’s in there.


More comments fun:

Projgen said:

“nononononononono! No! Never think of Pesach until AFTER Purim. In fact, I like to double torture myself and while I’m waiting for the hangover to wear off, I start thinking about Pesach. Sort of punishment for over-indulging at the Purim party 😉

Would the Chabad Rabbi not invite you and your husband for a seder? Or do you prefer hosting? And no, you wouldn’t have to eat matzah for two. But Gd willing, you’ll be eating everything else for two!”

Ahh. So true. Should have just enjoyed my Adarness.

And of course, the Chabad in town would gladly have us for a seder or two. I just enjoy hosting and like to make it my own little annual kiruv effort. If I can get 18 friends who would never eat kosher to eat kosher for just one night, I’d say I’ve made a difference.

We’re actually considering recruiting from the Reform synagogue. 🙂

* Of course I didn’t say that. Although I most certainly thought it. And it is good with salmon.


One response to “Dumb things I’ve done lately, abridged

  1. Personally, when you started talking about Pesach, I put my fingers in my ears, squinched my eyes shut, and started screaming: “I’m not listening! I can’t hear you!”

    I’m currently still in denial about Pesach, and I’m plenty pissed off that stores are so Pesach-stocked already.

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