Smut! My favorite!

It’s time I get another dark secret off my chest.

I have a massive crush on Michael Phelps. With the Olympics less than a year away, my heart is already getting flutters again.

For those of you who don’t understand, Michael Phelps is an exceptionally talented U.S. swimmer who won 6 gold and 2 bronze medals in Athens, tying the all-time single Olympics medal record.

He is also rather nice to look at.

The hubby tolerates this rather well. Depending on whom you ask, he actually bears a bit of resemblance to Mr. Phelps.

Please enjoy the eye candy below. For a more … umm … enjoyable look at all Michael Phelps has to offer, click here.

I feel much better for sharing now.

CD 2 (now with photos)

Not those kinds of photos. Eww.

So, this means I need to get off my duff and make an appointment to start the whole infertility process in Israel.

Not much other news to report (umm … cramps anyone?), but I’m posting some photos from aliyah and Israel. The best way to see everything I post about our big move, etc., is on Facebook or my work blog (link is on the right). If you want my real name to be my Facebook friend, e-mail me at whattoexpect2007 at hotmail dot com and I’ll get right back to you.

Otherwise, here’s some photos!

Our plane at JFK. It was named the Galilee.

Disembarking at Ben Gurion Airport.

This year’s Nefesh B Nefesh logo.

Logo closeup. All the charter flights have this on them.

The hubby and Kirby.

My usual Israeli lunch. Cucumbers, tomato and cheese sammich and sliced plums for dessert. I’ve lost 16 pounds in the four weeks since we got here. Funny how not eating crap helps with that.

The Tel Aviv train station. Kind of nice how most signs are like little flashcards when you’re trying to learn Hebrew.

Israrail train. Very clean, very quick and safe, efficient, and I love taking them places.

Soldiers waiting to go home for Shabbat. You can kind of see the different uniform colors. And the guns.

IKEA in Netanya. I adore IKEA. If I could work there, I would. I even love it in Heeblish. And the Swedish meatballs are kosher! How cool is that?

Don’t leave me or I’ll cry

I totally didn’t mean y’all shouldn’t read it — specially Rachel, Trilcat and the rest of the mishpocha. I just meant maybe the male portions of your household might be offended…

Please don’t go away. There won’t be anyone to water the comments and they’ll all die.

Consider yourself warned

So here’s the deal. I’ve been outed so to speak, though it was entirely of my own doing and I wouldn’t take it back.

You see, we moved to Israel. And that means we’ve met real live people who knew of us previously only in blogworld. That means that real people I have the privilege of interacting with nearly every day now know when I have my period. Or so they would, had I gotten my shit together and blogged recently.

Big deal you say? Well, see the problem is that observant Judaism kind of frowns on that. And I agree. I feel a bit like I’m wearing a bumper sticker on my tatas that says “Ask me about my 56-day cycle!”

So here’s the dealio. To all of the lovely people out there who have adopted us, nurtured us and made this move easier than I could have ever dreamed it would be: consider yourself warned.

I’m coming back to blogging. That means you might read any of the number of blog posts I have floating around in my head right now (working titles include “When undergarments attack” and “Things that go bump in the night”). You’ll know when my period gets here. If you’re lucky, you’ll get all the gory details you’ve come to expect, know and love. You’ll see me embrace the f-word with a love and frequency rarely seen outside of parenthood. So if you don’t want to know, please stop reading.

Or keep reading, but if you happen to be an X-Y model of the human species, it would be really fabulous if we didn’t have to discuss this stuff in real life.

Not that you would. You’re all much more tzniusdik about stuff than I am. I’m still learning. But let’s agree not to chat about the elasticity of my vaginal discharge in real life, shall we?

Okie dokie. Glad we got that out of the way. So I’m back. More to come soon.

I’m back …

And infertiler than ever!

Photos to come. It’s been a lot of hassle, but we finally got an Internet line at home. No time to post a long spiel right now since I need to get some sleep. Not much new to report on the procreation front. I have lost ten pounds since we set foot in Israel, so maybe that’ll help.

I’m going to request a proper workup from scratch for IVF or whatever here. More news on that as it happens.

I’m trying to catch up on blogs but hope you all are well.

We’re here!

Just a short note to say we made it to Israel a week ago. I’ll write more when we get Internet access at home.